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Date: Saturday, August 19th
Participants: 11
Ride Corps: 4
Punishments: Beer (Eye of the Hawk IPA or New Castle) and chili burgers/dogs for lunch.
Theme Song: Trogdor by Strong Bad
High Temp: 84°F

The 8th Annual Death March to the Motherfucking Sea was the first well documented Death March. With 11 participants, this was the largest Death March since the 2003 march. Also, Acer brought in a large number of friends, further showing his dedication to the cause. This was the march where punishments became related to titles.

It started with Jeshii, Greggors, Acer and Baker (meaning the original Ride Corps was only 4 people!) driving down to the end, and then everyone taking Phoebe back to Reseda. After a stop at Tommy’s on Topanga, they met up with the rest of the participants at the gate at the end of Reseda, sans Roy. After waiting for Roy, the march officially began at exactly 9:50am PDT. They later found Roy at the actual trailhead.

At 10:25am, they began along the Bent Arrow Trail.

At 11:25am, they arrived at the Hub where Greggors found a geocache. On the way up, the slower group encounters this random girl on her way down who jogs right up to Acer and remarks “Hey Ace, you’re slowing down!” After a moment of surprise, it became clear she was simply a messenger for someone in the faster group who wanted to boast their speedier arrival to the Hub.

At 11:47am, they arrived at the Martian Soil.

At 12:00am, they arrived at Eagle Rock. Much Punishments were imbibed. Baker lost his title as Protector of Buenos Aires (Argentina?) when he refused a beer.

At 1:30pm, they arrived at Musch Camp.

At Trippet Ranch, the group stratified into groups. The quick group consisted of Greggors, George, Roy, and Jeshii. The second group consisted of Acer, David, Baker, Mike, and Masaki, leaving Hasen and Travis to set their own pace.

The fast group took it upon themselves to do pushups every time they stopped. After this rule was enacted, they only stopped once by accident. After they did their pushups, they didn’t stop again until the sea. This noble act of self-Punishment was the original inspiration for the Redeemer title.

Around 3:30pm, the ocean was visible for the quick members. They made a brief stop and decided to do push ups to punish themselves. After this, the quick group didn’t stop until the end. At about the same time, the second group had finally crossed the stretch just past Trippet Ranch.

At 4:52pm, George touched the ocean to complete the Death March, followed by Greggors, Jeshii, and Roy. The 4 then ate peanuts out of the ceremonial hat and had a couple beers. They then got sick of waiting and got back to the cars to find Mike, Ace and Baker at about 6:30pm.

Meanwhile, the second group had split into even smaller groups with Acer, Masaki, and David deserting Baker and Mike who required more frequent stops due to leg pains. Leaving behind landmarks for Hasen and Travis, the quicker of the slower group came across the hairpin turn where the path makes a sharp split into the Los Liones path and SomeWhere Else. This is where they decided to stop and regroup as only Mike could be depended on to not miss this break.

Acer, Roy, Jeshii, Yayoi, and Mike officially finished off the march with Mongolian BBQ at around 8:30pm.


Sir Mike, Grand Marshal of the Death March, Protector of Mexico
Sir Jeshii, Lieutenant Marshal of the Death March, Protector of Guatemala
Sir Acer, Lieutenant of Punishments, Protector of Honduras
Sir Baker, Vice Lieutenant
Saint Masaki, Protector of Ecuador
Squire Roy
Sir George, Champion of the Sea, Protector of Costa Rica
Captain Greggors, Prime Chancellor of the Death March, Protector of Cuba
Sir Hasen, Protector of Argentina
Sir Travis, Protector of Panama
Sir David, Protector of Bolivia

← 2005 | ↑ The Legislative Era | 2007 →

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